Lots to tell

This is going to be a lengthy post. I thought about splitting it up, but each post would be separate and might get lost since the blog only shows a few posts at a time. So, here goes:

ZumbaThon
My friend Mell (MariaEugenia Llanca) has been working very hard on a ZumbaThon benefit for me. She wanted to do something to help us out financially with the medical bills, and she LOVES Zumba. (it's a salsa aerobics class for those who don't know) She was reading my blog one day and was really touched and blessed by something on here and God put it on her heart to bless me back and to do it in this way. So, for those of you in the Houston area, here is the info:
Saturday, November 13, 2010
11:30am-2:00pm
at 10225 Woodedge Dr. Houston TX 77070 (culture shapers/LRC building)
Prizes, give-aways, pink merchandise for sale, FREE Zumba classes for family, kid friendly activities, snacks

She has really worked hard on this, so please come out, even if you don't want to do the Zumba class. There is plenty of stuff to do for the whole family!
(There is also still time to sponsor if you or someone you know owns a business and wants to promote during the event or donate an auction item.)

Call Mell for more details: 281-571-3402

Surgeon Consultation
I had my surgeon consult on Wednesday. It did not go the way I envisioned it. I've mentioned my friend Moni on here before. We have almost identical cancer and are both getting treated at MD Anderson. We are both triple negative and stage 3 and both have lymph nodes affected. The only difference is that she was BRCA positive and I was negative. (This is the genetic testing) Well, Moni is 6 months or so ahead of me in treatments and I guess I figured I would just follow the same treatment plan as her. So far, it has been the same. So, when I went into the appointment my plan and idea was that I would be able to have the skin sparing mastectomy and lymph node removal, followed by radiation, followed by reconstructive surgery at which time they would remove the left breast and get implants in both....same as Moni...

Not their plan. I broke into tears when the Dr told me that they needed to do the total mastectomy on the right side and not the skin sparing mastectomy. Her explanation is because when you have a skin sparing mastectomy, they have to put a tissue expander in place to keep the skin from sagging during radiation. She said it would be harder in radiation to target the proper areas with a metal tissue expander in place. The biggest difference in the total and the skin sparing is the scar left behind. So, instead of just having the nipple removed and having everything removed from there, I will now have a scar from the middle of my chest across to the armpit. The other difference is that instead of leaving behind my muscle, they will be removing it which means that they have to construct the muscle to hold the implant using parts of my stomach or my back. I'm not really keen on that idea, but until I talk to the plastic surgeon, see pics, or get better understanding of the process I will be a little hesitant.

So, the battle wound scar is not so much an issue as the muscle reconstruction. I'm just on the fence about that idea. Everything else was the same as I had envisioned it. I had to do some convincing on my part for her to agree to remove the left breast, but she finally gave in and said she would do it if I still felt that way at the time of reconstruction...which I will. I cannot live in fear factor mode for the rest of my life and run down there to have every lump and bump biopsied. I'm toooo type A for that lifestyle. I'm waiting to hear back on when I get to meet with plastics and radiation and pushing for end of the year appointments before the mastectomy to make sure everyone is in agreement and on the same page. My mastectomy is scheduled for January 25.

Chemo Update
I am currently on day 10 after FAC chemo. I have been told that sometime between days 7 and 14 after chemo, my blood levels would drop and I would feel run down and tired. I'm still waiting on that.... I feel GREAT! Once we got the stomach issues worked out, I've been feeling awesome! Not completely awesome, but as awesome as can be expected in the world of cancer. When I was having stomach issues the other night, I talked to the nurse the following day and described to her my symptoms and told her what had happened. She felt like what I was experiencing was reflux. So, she told me to get some Zantac and take those as directed and ever since, I have been feeling much better. My hunger has also subsided, probably because the steroids have worn off most of the way. I don't feel like I have to eat quite so often. So, basically how I feel after chemo is like I felt when I was pregnant. Reflux, slight nausea but OK if I stay on top of my meds as directed, hungry, tired (but yet wide awake from anxiety), exhausted (but not able to sleep because of my toddler), and also bouts of energy here and there.

So, 3 more of these and I am DONE with chemo! My next chemo is schedule for November 11th. After that, if all goes well and my blood counts don't drop too much, I should be on target for December 2 and December 23 for the last of my chemo.

Team Tiffany shirts
I have a few more Team Tiffany shirts (screen printed and rhinestone) but most people who have expressed interest  in the shirts have already placed their orders. So, as I run out of certain sizes, I will be removing them from the store options. So, if you haven't purchased your shirt yet, be sure to do that as soon as you can because I probably won't be re-ordering since I have to order in increments and not singles.

Ok- so I think that's it. That should bring me up to date. Sorry for the amount of time between posting. I've been busy getting my kids ready for trick or treating, I had to make my daughters costume, and I have been trying to rest as much as possible, so I haven't been on the computer much.

Direct your prayers for me that I will continue to feel good during my last few treatments, and that everything regarding the mastectomy and reconstructive will fall into place and I will feel at ease about it all.

I hope you all have had a wonderful month of October. Breast cancer awareness month is officially over, but remember to check yourself often, and go get your yearly screenings.....no matter how old you are!

Rough night

Last night was my first rough night so far during this whole process. All afternoon/evening I was feeling icky. It's really hard to explain. I had this acid feeling in my throat and esophagus but I didn't know if it was heartburn, indigestion, empty stomach, or nausea. It felt like all of them, but it didn't feel like any of them. I know that really doesn't make sense, but that's the only way I can explain it. I wasn't sure if I should eat something or not. It reminded me of those first few weeks of pregnancy when you're hungry, but afraid to eat.... except I really never had that with any of my pregnancies. If I ate, it would go away. I haven't been "sick" in a LOOOOONG time....like teenage years probably. 3 pregnancies and a few stomach bugs and I've never gotten sick.

Not yesterday! I would eat something, and the feeling would go away for about an hour, but return again. I was told to take my nausea/vomit pill (Zofran) around the clock for the first 3 days after chemo whether I needed it or not. Just want to make sure I stay ahead of the nausea. Well, I did that Friday, Saturday and Sunday. Monday, I only took one pill all day and I felt Ok. So, yesterday, I didn't take any. I really didn't feel like the feeling was nausea. It really felt more like empty stomach feeling and when I ate it went away.

I tried to go to bed about 9:30 and laid there tossing and turning until about 1am. I woke Chris up numerous times with all my moving. I finally got out of bed at 1am because I couldn't take it anymore. I HATE more than anything to lay in bad and not fall asleep. It annoys the crap out of me. My stomach was growling (even though I had just eaten a light snack before bed), but it was a weird creaky door sound. Not my usual hungry-rumble-growl sound. This has been going on for about a week...since chemo. It really sounds like a creaky Halloween door opening. Again, hard to explain. I've never had that before. It didn't hurt, it just wouldn't stop. So, I ate a quick Bora Bora bar and took a Zofran, just to be safe.......

5 minutes later.....that came back up.

I don't know what happened. I ate small meals all day, never should've gotten hungry because I ate about every 3 hours, ate high protein stuff, and I didn't think I would need my Zofran this long. The steroids are making me ravishing-starving-hungry shortly after I eat, and I'm trying to focus on small meals....

I'm not much of a complainer, but that was rough. I finally was able to go to sleep about 3am only to be awakened at 5:30 am by my bouncing 2 year old saying "mommy...me hungwy...peese make me pantakes.... bekfest....peeeeeeese" (I managed to convince him to have "tookie cereal" instead...yes, I gave him Cookie Crisp because he looves his "tookies" and he hasn't been eating breakfast lately)

The only joy I can find is that at least I don't have to hold my hair back out of the way....

FAC Chemo #1

 I had a long day at MD Anderson yesterday. We had to be there at 8am for a blood draw, (stopped in to see Deana while she was in pre-op, she got her new boobs yesterday!) followed by a Dr appt with my oncologist, followed by a small 4 hour period of nothing, then a nutritionist followed by chemo. Well, we ran some errands during that 4 hr break, but still go back around noon, so we went ahead and checked in for chemo. They started me at about 12:30 and the whole process with all 7 bags was just over 3 hours.

They started off with my 3 bags of Pre-meds. Adavan for anxiety, which makes you tired. Dexamethasone steroids for reactions and nausea, and makes you hyper, and Zofran for nausea and vomiting. Normally on the way home from Taxol, I was chatty Cathy but this Adavan knocked me out and I took a nap on the way home this time. Then after a quick flush, they started the heavy duty stuff. Adriomycin (the red devil as it's usually called) and Cytoxan were first. They drip by gravity, so there is no time limit on those. Just depends on how fast your port allows it to go through. The last one is the 5-FU, the big bag. It is infused over a 1 hr period through the machine.

So, while it was dripping, the nutritionist came to visit, Chris watched TV, Moni visited, and I worked on designs. It wasn't bad and it felt like water going through me. As I mentioned, I crashed on the way home because I was so tired. We stopped for a quick bite to eat at our staple "after-chemo" place....Which-Wich. It's an awesome sandwich shop and since it's lighter fare, it sets well in my tummy.

Chris does well taking care of me. He gets me home, gives me whichever prescriptions I need to take and puts me to bed. Last night we got home earlier than expected, so I got to see the kids for a minute before they headed to bed. I was in bed shortly after.

It took me a while to fall asleep, and I slept pretty good, except a 1 hour block that I was awake during the middle of the night. I had to get a snack and take another anti-nausea pill. I slept in this morning and had my friend came get the kids for school. Since my mom was there overnight, she was able to get them all ready for school and get them out the door. She then stayed with Grayson until I woke up. We all had lunch together today before she headed back to her house with Grayson. She is keeping him until Sunday so I only have 2 to deal with so I can rest. She's such a sweet mommy!

 

 Yesterday, Grayson got sent home from school with a fever. I was so thankful that everyone managed to take care of him without having to call me. Mary picked him up from school, called my mom to meet her at the house and brought him here, found the key I had left, and got him inside and took his temperature. Mom told us about it as we called during chemo, but thank goodness they were able to take care of him and found everything without having to call me. I would have worried myself sick over him. He woke up fine this morning and it was probably just a reaction to his flu shot from the day before. (He calls it a blue shot, so we don't get the blues, I guess) 

The hardest thing throughout this whole cancer process so far has been the guilt. Mostly with the kids. I "feel" fine, so I tend to not ask for help. I am running myself ragged and not resting like I should be, so my Dr scolded me, as did my friend Moni, who had some helpful tips. So, I've arranged a "Personal Assistant" who will be making calls on my behalf to friends and family who have offered to help, and will be having them help, without me asking. I tried to apply for the "Cleaning for a reason" cleaning services. They clean once a month for free, for women in cancer treatment, but go figure...no one in my area. So, now my cobwebs in the window and dust on the shelves will just stay....hahaha. We have managed so far to get the basics done, but we don't ever have time to get to the more time consuming stuff. We pick up, vacuum, clean the kitchen, and do laundry. That's about it. Bathrooms get done about once every week if we're lucky.

This regimen I am on is going to make me more tired, which means I don't have a choice but to rest, or I will fall asleep where ever I am....even if it's driving. SOOOOO, I have to rest, and swallow my pride and ask for help....or have Eva do it for me. Chris has too much on his plate and needs a break.

I'm just thankful I have friends in my life who are WILLING to help, and WANT to help. It's unfair having cancer with little ones so young. Arranging the childcare has been the toughest thing, and then making sure whoever is picking up/dropping off has car seats since all 3 kids are still in car seats. I'm gonna have one heck of a garage sale in a few years.....we own 9 car seats! 3 in my suburban, 3 in Chris' truck and 3 floaters.

So, to all you wonderful people who have asked what you can do, send me an email and I'll put you in touch with Eva who can tell you what you can do, based on your "likes" and "dislikes". Let's face it....only people who LIKE doing toilets are going to want to volunteer to clean my bathrooms.....I have a newly potty trained 2 yr old who won't point his pecker down because he refuses to touch it....and he pees straight out in front..... yeah... that's fun!

Me playing around with the "red devil" cocktail, pretending I was a vampire and it was blood. I guess I was in a Halloween mood.....

Until next time......